Have you ever felt a pull inside of you that says something along the lines of, "This is meaningful; this is good; you/your children must do this"? For the past several years I have felt strongly that my children must learn to sing. However, I did not know why, and I was bothered both by my inability to explain this oddity of mine and my failure to find a choir experience that would be a good fit for them. I searched and searched and found one that was too simplistic and another that was much too advanced. Finally, last fall, the pieces fell into place and we were able to start a small children's choir for our homeschool group - it was thrilling! I have longed for years for our children to have this experience, though I could not figure out why it felt so important. Is it because of my own positive singing experiences? I joined a choir during the last two years of my undergraduate college degree, and it felt like one of the most significant experiences of my life - but why? Singing with others in church or in small groups often gives me goosebumps - but why? Why should we sing? Why do others love it too? Why is it so meaningful?
After much toil and sweat and thought I have found eight reasons to satisfy my own questioning - and perhaps this will encourage you to use your voice a little more also.
But first a disclaimer, lest you think, oh, she is a musician but I am not, so this does not apply to me: I am not A Real Singer™ any more than you are. I don't know all the vocal techniques, my voice is not rich and powerful, and it took me years and years of practice to learn how to sing a basic harmony line. I never took voice lessons and the only bits of singing wisdom I've gathered came from two years of singing in a college choir and then two more years of paying attention while accompanying a (different) college choir on the piano. I can't sing the extra-high notes or the extra-low notes, and my voice often wobbles or cracks. But in spite of all this, singing brings me great joy and I have seen the power of joining my own small voice with other small voices to create something larger than ourselves.
Why You And Your Child Should Sing, Preferably Together
Because God commands us to. There are not many commands in the Bible that are repeated over 160 times, but "sing!" is one of them. Sometimes a reason is given - "for His mercy endures forever;" "for He has done marvelous things" - but other times it is not, and we are simply commanded to praise the Lord through song. Clearly God feels this should be an important part of our life on earth, and I'm not about to argue with him.
Because we should create music, not just consume music. We live in a culture of consumerism, the latest proof being the four (four!!) toy catalogs I received just in the last week (all four went straight to the trash, thankyouverymuch). We are constantly being encouraged to buy and consume and buy and consume and then buy some more. If you are bothered by this idea, you can push back against it by consuming less but also by creating more. This can be done with other instruments also, but singing requires no purchase of an instrument, no sheet music, and no formal training (unless you want to join a choir or take lessons). I find there's something a bit magical about having an instrument within our bodies that we access at any time, in any location, to use for creating a joyful noise. While it is still enjoyable and worth our time, consuming music does not result in the same sense of fulfillment and accomplishment that comes from creating music. One of the most depressing things I've ever seen was a "worship" service at a megachurch - the auditorium was packed, the music filled the hall, but hardly a person was singing. Instead, the audience members were mere passive consumers, listening to the praise band on the stage and throwing out an occasional half-hearted "amen." This is not how it is meant to be!
Because it's good for our mental and emotional health. I don't need to convince you that music is good for our brains and our bodies. If you've spent any time listening to any kind of music you know well enough the power of music to calm our bodies, to encourage our minds, to express our emotions, and to refresh our spirits. Science has confirmed over and over again what we intuitively know to be true, and it says that yes, music is good for babies and toddlers and the elderly and everyone in between. There are entire college degrees devoted to the therapeutic properties of music. I would say the more healthy ways our children have to express their emotions, the better!
Because it's a life-long skill. Your child can use his voice to bless others for his entire life. At church, at birthday parties, at Christmas, at Grandma's house, in a school choir, in a community choir, formally or informally, being able to carry a tune and perhaps even sing a harmony or two is a joy and a gift that never stops giving. Furthermore, if you are a Christian, did you realize that we will be singing in heaven? That means that singing is not just a life-long skill, but an eternity-long skill! We'll be doing it forever and ever into the ages - so we may as well start enjoying it now.
Because it's an attitude check. I don't know about you, but I cannot sing when I'm in a funk, or when my attitude is lousy, or when I'm upset at my husband. When I see our children mumbling along with our morning song at home, or just standing and staring at the song leader in church, it's a clue that I need to dig a little deeper and see what's going on. Granted, singing (or a lack thereof) solves nothing - but I will take all the clues into my child's heart that I can get.
Because it brings us together. I cannot fully explain this one, but I know that creating music with others has a strong and lasting bonding effect. I saw this when I joined that choir in college, I've seen it in church, and I am beginning to see it in our family. It brings us physically together, as we move towards the piano or gather around a sheet of music; it brings us emotionally together as we work hard to match the pitches and rhythms of our voices; and I believe it brings us spiritually together if we have the same words and truths in our minds. In this respect, singing with others feels different than playing an instrument with others because 99% of the time singing involves words, and words contain ideas, and ideas are powerful. If you want one more bond to help tie your family together, try singing together!
Because it's fun. It really is! Our three older boys recently learned how to sing a round for the first time, which is quite a challenge if you've never done it before. In case you haven't sung a round since elementary school, it's simple to explain but slightly harder to execute: two groups are singing the same tune but starting at different times. Once you try it, you realize that it takes a fair amount of maturity and concentration to be able to continue along with your own group and not be distracted or confused by the other group! A year ago, our children could not have done this. However, last week when I watched them successfully sing through this entire difficult song, working together with nine other children to create a piece of music with more complexity than any they had yet mastered, there was such joy on their faces! They were proud of their accomplishment and relishing the sound of the music they had made with nothing more than their own small voices.
Because we need more light in the world. A few years ago the children and I were singing along to a Christmas album by the Gettys and I was struck by one line in one particular song:
"Sing, for the light overwhelms the dark!"
Does it really? I wondered. The world is full of pain and grief and darkness, and the last three years have piled it on thick. Natural disasters and pandemics and wars and economic woes fill the headlines, not to mention closer-to-home troubles of family and friends that weigh on our hearts. Most of this is entirely beyond our control! Where is this light of which they speak? Now, as Christians we know that there will come a day when the Light will finally and completely overcome the Dark; we also know Jesus who is the Light of the World, and we see the power of the gospel that gives us joy and assurance of life after death. This, I think, is what the song was referencing. However, in a much smaller sense of the word, I think that we as mothers are responsible for creating a home where our children can tangibly see and feel this light. It's difficult for adults - even more so for children - to imagine a far-off future where evil is no longer in existence, but we can catch little glimpses of it, just a hint of a memory yet to come, when we experience the beauty and truth given us here on earth. I think that God helps children understand his own love through the love of their parents, and he reveals to us a glimpse of heaven's perfection through the stunning vistas of creation here on earth. We catch bits of eternal truths in the stories we read, and we feel a small taste of heaven's music in the songs we sing. These are not mere frivolities - they are vital beacons of light! It is fundamentally impossible for me or you to stop the next hurricane or cure a pandemic or bring peace to the Middle East - but we can bring a little more light into our lives and our children's lives by loving them well and sharing with them this beauty that is ours for the taking. If we couple this with the rock-solid, life-giving truths found in God's word - well, that darkness doesn't stand a chance.
And so, we sing. Our voices may shake and the notes may be flat; we may be gulping breaths at inopportune times and wheezing at others - but still we open our mouths, and somehow, in spite of it all, music emerges.
It's not always easy. It's not always beautiful. But it is good.
"Music! Into the drab and hurried blur of breathless twentieth-century life,
allow time and enjoyment and growth for this aspect of our humanness."
~ Susan Schaeffer Macaulay, For the Children's Sake
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